Reprogramming the Nervous System for Bliss
- MaryLisa Emery
- Aug 15
- 6 min read
Why You Can’t Feel Good (and How to Reclaim It)
There’s a reason you can read all the affirmations, journal until your pen runs dry, even know you “should” be happy — and yet still feel flat, disconnected, or like joy just skims across the surface without ever landing.
It’s not because you’re broken. It’s not because you don’t “want it badly enough.”
It’s because your nervous system might be blocking your access to pleasure and intuition — the very pathways that allow you to feel, receive, and create the life you want.
⚡️Biologically and emotionally, I was a hot mess this summer. I went through an earth-shattering ego death that no one prepared me for.
Don't worry, my "death" was actually a rebirth.
But because I was thrown into the void, my nervous system was on lock down.
Dancing didn't bring me pleasure
Painting was off the table
Going out with friends was met with apathy
My creative business ventures stalled
"What the fuck??"
"I'm a psychic and feminine-embodiment coach! How could this happen to me?"
When I got over the pity and disappointment party, I alerted my family and friends that I would be unavailable for a while, that I was deep in a shit-storm of darkness, but that I would be back soon.
I surrendered, I accepted, and I let the tsunami fully take me under.
I let my body lead me, and I deeply felt my pain (my ancestors pain) for weeks.
I stopped forcing myself to be GOOD and I let myself be BAD
And once the storm passed, I walked out of my cave with a renewed sense of deep love, deep sensuality, and deep alignment.
I am sure that I was able to come out stronger, sexier, more confident, and happy because I let my nervous system PROCESS AND FEEL the emotional trauma I was experiencing rather than refusing to fall apart.
My capacity for great grief, preceded my capacity for great pleasure.
So let's dive in to how this is possible:
The Science of Feeling Good (and Why You Might Be Avoiding It)
Reprogramming the nervous system for bliss means understanding it.
Your nervous system is the command center for every emotional, physical, and psychic experience you have. It’s designed to scan for danger, process stimuli, and help you respond to the world. But it’s also the gateway for joy, safety, and deep pleasure.
Here’s the catch: if you’ve been in a chronic state of stress — whether from trauma, overwork, heartbreak, or living in a culture that constantly demands you “keep up” — your system can get stuck in survival mode.
In survival mode, your body prioritizes protection over pleasure. It diverts resources away from digestion, hormonal balance, and emotional openness, and into muscle tension, shallow breathing, and constant vigilance.
Scientifically, this means:
Your sympathetic nervous system (fight/flight) dominates, keeping cortisol high and oxytocin low.
Your polyvagal pathways stay tuned to threat, not connection.
Your limbic system — the part of your brain tied to emotion and memory — gets hijacked by old fear patterns.
Result? Even when life is technically “good,” your body can’t feel it.
Stress Doesn’t Just Steal Your Joy — It Steals Your Intuition
If you’ve ever felt like you “lost” your intuition, couldn’t trust your instincts, or were blocked from your inner knowing, this is often the missing piece.
Your intuition — the quiet, clear, gut-deep guidance system — requires presence. It speaks in subtleties: a pull, a sensation, a flash of insight, a sudden knowing. But when your nervous system is locked in stress, your body is scanning for danger instead of perceiving opportunity.
From a psychic perspective, chronic stress scrambles your energetic field. Your biofield — the electromagnetic field generated by your body — becomes static-heavy. Your signal is still there, but it’s muffled.
It’s like trying to tune into your favorite frequency while a storm crackles through the radio. You don’t stop being intuitive; you just can’t hear yourself clearly over the noise.
The Covert Trauma Patterns That Quietly Keep You Stuck
When we think of trauma responses, we picture obvious triggers — panic attacks, visible anxiety, bursts of anger. But more often, they hide in everyday behaviors that seem harmless… even productive.
If your nervous system has been running survival patterns for years, you might notice:
1. The Over-Functioner
Always “handling it” so nothing falls apart
Can’t relax without guilt because you equate rest with laziness
Confuses hyper-productivity with worthiness
2. The Emotional Minimalist
Downplays wins (“It’s no big deal…”)
Doesn’t let excitement get too high because “something might ruin it”
Avoids deep intimacy because it feels unpredictable
3. The Chronic Adapter
Changes personality or opinions to avoid conflict
Anticipates other people’s needs before they ask
Feels safer being liked than being honest
4. The Pleasure Saboteur
Cancels plans that are “just for fun”
Chooses relationships or jobs that keep you slightly on edge
Believes joy is something you have to earn
These aren’t random quirks. They’re survival codes your nervous system installed when it believed the world wasn’t safe. The problem? What once kept you safe now blocks the very things you want most: deep love, joy, trust, and intuitive clarity.
Why Embodiment Is the Key Back
Most people try to “think” their way into feeling better: reframing thoughts, forcing positive affirmations, willing themselves to relax. But thinking is often the very thing keeping the loop alive.
The Holy Harlot philosophy is different. It’s about dropping into the body — not to bypass the mind, but to restore the body’s role as the temple, the oracle, the healer. Because the body is the subconscious mind. Where 95% of your programming lives!
When you’re embodied:
Your breath deepens, telling your brain it’s safe.
Your muscles release old stories stored as tension.
Your fascia unwinds, letting go of pain patterns that keep you braced.
Your hormonal system begins producing the chemistry of connection and pleasure.
This is where science meets sacred: as oxytocin rises and cortisol drops, your energy field becomes more coherent. In this state, your intuition sharpens, your pleasure pathways light up, and your emotional capacity expands.
From Science to Psychic — Bridging Body and Energy
Regulating your nervous system is only the first step. You can’t simply calm your body down and expect everything to change — you also have to re-pattern your energetic field. Otherwise, you’ll keep magnetizing the same situations, people, and outcomes that match your old stress imprint.
Here’s how to bridge the two:
1. Re-Sensitize the Body:
Most people haven’t lost their capacity for pleasure or intuition — they’ve simply gone numb to it. Years of bracing against life can make even joy, rest, or excitement feel unsafe. Re-sensitization means slowly restoring your body’s ability to register and trust sensation.
How much of your day are you actually present in your body? Do you talk to your body? Tell it "well-done!" or "i love you!" because yeah, its basically your Inner Child just wanting to be loved and felt.
2. Use Pleasure and Fun as Pattern Shifters:
Pleasure and fun aren’t indulgences — they’re some of the fastest ways to rewire the nervous system. Nourishing, novel, and enjoyable experiences send the message right now that it’s safe to open, creating new neural and energetic patterns more effectively than force or willpower. Do you have a swing near your house? A dance routine dying to be made? Chalk characters begging to be drawn on the side-walk? Being silly is medicine. That's science.
3. Reorganize the Field with Psychic Tools:
Biofield tuning, energetic clearing, and auric strengthening remove static and reorganize your energy so your body and field can hold safety together. Most of the crap tucked away in your cells and fascia is not even yours! Hello, empaths.
This sharpens intuition, stabilizes the shifts you make, and prevents you from sliding back into old patterns.
When your body and energy body start speaking the same language, they tell the world — and you — the same truth:I am safe. I can feel. I can receive.
What This Means for You Right Now
If you’ve been feeling…
Numb to happiness, even when “good things” happen
Disconnected from your body
Unsure if you can trust yourself
Constantly braced for something to go wrong
Or continuing to butt your head against the same obstacles
…it’s not just a mood. It’s your nervous system’s survival setting.
The good news? This isn’t permanent. Your nervous system can rewire. Your body can re-learn safety. Your field can clear.
From there, the emotions you’ve been chasing — joy, confidence, connection, deep love — aren’t something you have to think about creating. They rise up naturally. They live in you.
Why This Work Matters Now
We live in a world that rewards women for overriding themselves. Push harder. Be “on” all the time. Smile even when you’re exhausted.
But the cost is enormous: we burn out, lose touch with our bodies, and live our lives in a low-grade freeze. Our intuition dims. Our capacity for real love and joy shrinks.
You can restore your sacred intelligence, and no, it doesn't live in the mind
We can restore not just our nervous systems, but our magnetism, our emotional capacity, and our psychic connection.
Ready?
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